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TRUDY VAN DER WEERDEN / VERPLAK
(Gertruida)
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Antoinette's Excursion to Australia.
In reality it was to hide that her uncle Roland Schupbach fathered the child from having sex with her on Brighton Beach in Christchurch. Click on the image to read the full story (PDF). Use your browser's 'back' button to return to this page. |
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IF you are lonely visit the sick in hospital . |
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BORN: 30/12/1937 (Nijmegen)
Immigrated together with Topy to New Zealand in 1958. RESIDENCE 178 Selwyn Street, Christchurch, New Zealand. MARRIAGES: Widow to Jan van der Weerden FOTO: The Wedding (Jan & Trudy) |
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Spreydon (Christchurch, New Zealand).
HET PIEST PRECAS Jan spent some months with Antoon in Sydney, Australia, modifying the sliding doors in his house to hinging doors. Jan was a good and dedicated tradesman (carpenter). Antoon and Jan always got on well with each other. Message to Hanny: Jan did this work for Antoon in exchange for Antoon providing the airfare and supersize steaks for dinner... Unlike you, who claims Antoon has NO RIGHT to ask anything in exchange for his contribution to your airfare, should you visit him. |
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Trudy and Jan
This and the next photo taken during one of Antoon's visit to Topy & Trudy. |
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Trudy loves gardening, and also does volunteer work for the Botanical Gardens in Christchurch. |
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Life Experiences
Netherlands, New Zealand. Lived in New Zealand all of her life with the occasional returns to our homeland. Education Kleuter Klas / Bewaar School (Kindergarten) Lagere School Hogere School MULO Diplomas Type Diploma (Type Writing Diploma) Employment Flower shop (Shop Assistant, Nijmegen) Chocolate Factory (Packer, Nijmegen) Karitane Hospital (Nurse, Christchurch) Religion Roman Catholic Church Other interests Gardening Botanical Gardens (Christchurch, New Zealand) Piano |
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LETTER FROM ANTOON TO TRUDY - 15NOV20
Trudy, I always had a deep respect for you, likewise for Topy. But I struggled to understand why the bitching from Topy, but much less understand your reasons for excluding me from the family. However we fit the definition of being a family of sociopaths (having no consideration for each other). First, a rehash of the issues you see as "living in the past", but they have never been properly dealt with. 1. When Mayette told you just after our honeymoon that she did not love me, any loving sister would have informed me, so I would have had the opportunity to make a choice between leaving her in her home country or to continue married life with her. It could have saved me from losing all I worked for up to her predetermined period of 5 years of marriage (yes, it was all planned in advance). Just the legal fees over 2 years destroyed my business and subsequently fucked up my life, not to mention the adverse effect on a child. 2. You ratted on Michael to his ex-wife Wendy about his whereabouts. Your contradicting excuses make no sense. Eventually that also resulted in Michael estranging from me as I maintained friendly relations with you and Topy. Michael and I used to be best of friends before. Since then I have no brother I can visit or talk with (you did say that you cannot afford losing your friendship with Topy, so you should understand). 3. When I sent you a letter for Topy asking to discuss issues that had been troubling me, you ignored my attached note asking you to view it before passing it on and tell me if you feel I should modify anything. To this date, you even refuse to acknowledge that note. Subsequently Topy considered my letter a "complaint" and banned me from her life. Then you "agreed with Topy". 4. On occasions I enquired about your children but you consistently ignored me including when I asked for any contact details when I learned that one of them intended to visit Australia. It would have been nice to get together here (as I suggested). 5. When I planned to visit while Hanny was staying with you, you asked me to leave before your planned trip to visit your son Tony in Duniden. Oh, you had lots of contradicting excuses. Although I had paid for the flight I did not board the flight as I felt insulted. What a waste of money! 6. Two years later the same, this time to visit your daughter Antoinette in Hamilton with Hanny and visit a flower show... Once again, you gave me contradicting excuses. 7. When I explained why I wanted to return to NZ to live, you told me "If you are lonely, visit the sick in hospital". Clearly shows you don't give a fuck about family (except your own kids). Let me spell that out once again: I thought it would be nice to live in the same town so we could visit each other, especially after Arlene and I split up. Topy's bitching made me aware that she did not value it so I did not buy that house "on the rocks" (Topy's expression) that could have been bought for less than half it's market value. 8. A similar response was made later, proposing I join some walking group with old people instead. 9. You never showed any interest in my activities and earlier claimed that I was "not interested in anything". Remember when I wrote you that Anton bought his first car? You responded by saying you are absolutely not interested in that, but started lecturing how I should bring up my kids. 10. Recently you claimed that I blamed you for "breaking up of Michael's marriage". I never suggested or implied anything like that. When Arlene and I split, you were the first one to gossip the 'news' to Wendy. No condolences of any kind to your brother... where are your loyalties Trudy? Apparently ex-wives are more important. I sent you a photo of me and my cat Oscar. No response from you. Just yesterday I accidentally learned you have a cat (Monty) from your facebook page (23 March 2020). Wouldn't it be nice to share that with your brother... but no, I am nothing to you. To this date you remain good at lecturing. Normal families try to patch things up for their siblings, but you do the opposite. You lectured me on 'love' but I suggest you don't even know the meaning of the word. You acknowledge we live in the last years of our lives, yet we insist on criticizing each other. Clearly you are sooooo happy with your life, you cannot see how your brother's life has been fucked up. Enough of this family insanity. Your eldest son is a practising psychiatrist and has his practise just across the street from you. Why don't you make an appointment with him to sort yourself and your sisters out (before we're all under the clover)??? See phone number and link to his website below |
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VISSER & ASSOCIATES
Marcel van der Weerden Counsellor, Psychodramatist Address: Somerfield Centre, 181 Selwyn Street, Spreydon, Christchurch 8024 Phone: 02 7477 4439 Email: marcel50@xtra.co.nz Website: http://www.visser.net.nz/marcel-van-der-weerden |
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ABOUT TRUDY:
After all, out of the blue and without any basis, Trudy once wrote to Hanny that Antoon called Trudy a prostitute. Only when Antoon proved that he never did, she withdrew that. On the matter of ratting on Michael (to Wendy), first she justified it, later she denied it. Just what's wrong with these people? Even late in our lives these ladies are still excluding Antoon from family visits. Antoon lives in Australia on his own (but only a two-hour flight away) but these ladies don't give a rat's arse. Trudy, in case you still think Antoon is not interested in anything, he is a committee member of the Glenlyon Landcare Group. He has a property of 60 acres which he developed almost single-handed and planted thousands of trees. Aside from that he has many interests. You have absolute contempt for the family. Antoon has often expressed disappointment that we have next to no communication with our extended family members.
HERE IS WHERE THE SHIT REALLY STARTED A number of years ago, after Michael and Wendy divorced, Michael asked Trudy not to disclose his address to his ex-wife Wendy. The reasons for that is nobody's business, but Trudy made it her business. After initial refusal, Trudy says that Michael's kids contacted her (wanting his address) and also her own kids who expressed an opinion that Michael's kids are entitled to visit their father, so she provided Wendy with his address. But in reality it had nothing to do with that. In fact Michael's kids did not visit him before and never visited him after that. What it was really all about: Wendy wanted Michael to pay for Lara's Medical Doctor degree studies, something Michael was not in a position to do. Wendy intended to serve Michael with a Court Summons but Michael did not want to get involved in court proceedings. Earlier Michael was closely following the legal proceedings between Antoon and his former visa scammer wife Mayette, which lasted over two years and destroyed him in legal fees alone. Michael wasn't keen on playing that dirty game so asked Trudy not to give his address. FAMILY TREASON But Trudy ratted on Michael, citing pressure from her kids (based on their uninformed opinions) and her own justifications. It forced Michael to sell his house and go into hiding, just for the sake of peace. It also costed Antoon a close friend and brother, but Trudy cannot understand such ramification and shows no interest. She still refuses to make any sort of apology, but plenty of excuses/justifications (same as Ma's character) which changed over time. Michael called it "Family Treason". FEMALES GANGING UP Hanny waded in, with a couple of emails to Antoon: |
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Hanny "wil het kwijt", ziet anderen als vuilnisbak voor haar gedachten. Hanny most happy to make a bunch of wild assumptions, really showing the bitch within her. Hanny, this was well after the kids had grown up. Michael always loved his kids and provided them with everything they needed. Hanny might apologise to Michael for gossiping her misguided views. Apologise??? No chance! Lekker makkelijk en laf om zo over je broer to lullen. Waarom schrijf dit niet direct naar Michael, je hebt zijn adres toch? Trudy's denial (but earlier she justified it). Did Wendy ask twice? |
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From: Trudy van der Weerden Sent: June 13, 2016 19:51 PM To: Toon Verplak Subject: Re: The Follies of the Verplak Family ... I shall explain again. When I told Wendy Michael's address he never told me that it was to be a secret. So, when it happened again I knew not to give her his address and I never did. The whole family came to the telephone. Wendy, Nicolai, Jan and Antoinette were of the opinion that she should have it. I never gave it, and that is the truth. ... Your sister Trudy |
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NO FAMILY LOYALTY Hanny & Frans also remain in touch with Wendy and stayed with her each time they visited Australia for a campervan tour. But Wendy didn't want Antoon to come to Nicolai's (Michael's son) 40th birthday party), presumably just because he is Michael's brother (but overruled by Michelle). Is Hanny not Michael's sister? More recently when Antoon and Arlene parted, Trudy was quick to relay the bad news to Wendy, not even bothering to send him any condolences. That part of the family used to visit Antoon, but since then nothing, except to return a book but came without the kids. At Nicolai's 40th surprise birthday party, Wendy did not want Antoon to attend (although overruled by Misha's wife Michelle). Antoon asked Trudy what else she might have written to Wendy... to this date she refuses to respond to that question. Wendy (who referred to Antoon as "a blast from the past") is hostile but to Trudy she is more important than her brothers. And more recently... Antoon's last visit to New Zealand was scheduled for January 2016 to meet with Trudy & Hanny. A few days earlier Trudy asked Antoon: |
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Antoon first thought it was a sightseeing trip so he proposed to rent a car. After a couple of emails it turned out that they wanted to visit her son Tony's family but without Antoon (who months earlier arranged to visit for a week). Antoon found that very offensive and on the day prior to travel decided not to board the flight. Especially in view of earlier comments that there is next to no communication between our close relatives. There was a follow up of emails where Trudy provided Antoon with a number of different and conflicting excuses. |
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Contradicting statements. It simply means we have no family values/loyalties as clearly demonstrated earlier in respect of Michael. Just keep exchanging gossip with Michael’s hostile ex-wife. Trudy had no idea Antoon was interested? Trudy showed no interest in Antoon's children... it's mutual. Good reason to also refuse Antoon any contact with Tony and his family? There is next to no communication between our respective children. It was never encouraged by the parents, and now it couldn't be more obvious. TWO YEARS LATER, THE SAME STUNT Hanny visits Trudy, overflying Antoon without a single word... First Trudy invited Antoon to visit her for her 80th birthday on December 30, indeed a positive thing, but then she said he can come in November but need to leave by November 27, as she and Hanny are going to visit her daughter Antoinette in Hamilton and attend a flowershow in nearby Auckland. Antoon not invited and not allowed to come. |
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Family???
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http://www.nzherald.co.nz/nz/news/article.cfm?c_id=1&objectid=10846960
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NZ Herald Photo / Christine Cornege Antoon learns about Antoinette and her two kids from a search on the internet. |
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NZ Herald
More comfortable and power bill falls 13 Nov, 2012 5:30am Hamilton homeowner Antoinette van der Weerden's house is warm as toast during winter and cool during summer - and her power bill has come down. Ms van der Weerden had underfloor and ceiling insulation installed two years ago using the Warm Up New Zealand Scheme and said she and her two children noticed the difference straight away. "It's not a super house or anything but it feels like a cosy little nest now ... it just feels like a home. It's really yummy and warm and they love being there. We used to live in a very draughty old house in Old Farm Rd and the shift was incredible." She had also noticed their piano didn't pick up moisture any more as the keys didn't stick. The solo mother's power bill has also fallen from $180 a month before having her house insulated to between $100 and $120. She said the heat came into her north-facing home from the sun and the insulation kept it warm. Her Claudelands home was built in 1982 from plaster board and the cost of insulation would have been between $1200 and $1600 once her Community Services discount of 60 per cent was included. However, the landscape design tutor managed to secure one of the few grants entitling her to free installation. "I really didn't have to do anything and these two guys came and put the insulation in. It was kind of like a miracle you know, all free, done." |
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NO INTEREST IN EACH OTHER
Evidence that Trudy never was interested in Antoon's children (but accused Antoon of not being interested in anything): |
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Total invalidation of what Antoon wrote about his kids, instead a lecture on how he should raise them. Well, decades before that Trudy challenged Antoon that he was not interested in anything. She clearly did not notice he was in music groups, taught music, performed in various places (including The Lodge at Hanmer Springs). Trudy never did show up at any of those venues. Trudy also challenged him that playing bassguitar (one finger) is easier then playing piano (ten fingers). Is that what music is all about? Antoon acquired fame (in New Zealand) in his own right. Did Trudy? Actually, Trudy, you are not even correct about your one finger theory, and all violin players would surely feel pissed off with such comments. In fact, Antoon's interests are wide and varied (but you wouldn't know, you take no interest in him). Recently Antoon also learned that on his honeymoon with Mayette (the visa scammer), Mayette told Trudy that she did not love him. Normally, any sane person would tell his/her brother that, but she didn't. After many times asking why, eventually she told him "You were already married"... WTF. When he told her about his two years of hell with Mayette's lawyers, she just responded with "I didn't know that", but showed no further interest. Earlier Antoon put his issues with Topy in a letter asking for a discussion, via Trudy asking Trudy to check it first before passing on to Topy and let me know if I should change anything before passing it on. But it was ignored and Trudy never even acknowledged the accompanying letter. Topy got angry and she saw it only as complaints, and then Trudy agreed... but why she did not discuss the letter with Antoon before passing it? To this date she refuses to give an answer. Ma has that same attitude. Instead of a discussion, Topy banned Antoon from her life. One day Antoon and Trudy inspected a semi-rural property on the hills near Lyttleton. Trudy was awed by this one man who dedicated his whole life to maintaining this property. Funnely enough, Trudy showed very little interest in Antoon's property, which is of a similar nature and even larger. In another email from Trudy to Antoon: |
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ONCE AGAIN, OUT OF THE BLUE ANTOON STANDS ACCUSED OF OWING MONEY TO MICHAEL (BY TRUDY) Here is Antoon's response: Michael is out of his life since many years, thanks to Trudy. Antoon never said that. He said that the matter was settled. Then Trudy assumes Michael's claim to be fact (yet again). Trudy has forgotten (or took no notice) that in a letter and accompanying statement made on February 1 1998 to all family members, Antoon declared that Michael's claim of $17,000.00 was settled. And went on to explain how it was settled (not $25,000.00 Trudy). Excerpt from this Statement: |
| 4. Michael based his claim on 3 transactions in the C.H. Schupbach account in 1990, which he "happened to remember" in 1994, shortly after having claimed that Topy Schupbach never repaid her loan from Mother about 10 years ago. |
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It seems there exists a bit of dementia in the family. OUWE KOEIEN UIT DE SLOOT Some mail from 09/02/1998 Out of the blue and for no apparent reason Trudy wrote to Hanny that Antoon called Trudy a 'prostitute'. Hanny took that as fact and 'reminded' Antoon that he called Trudy a 'prostitute'. Antoon never called Trudy anything like that, never had any reason for that, and proved that to Trudy. That's the only thing Trudy ever apologised for. Plenty of claims of others not being interested in anything and admission by Trudy that she was not interested in Antoon's kids. Likewise recently Trudy wrote Antoon that he owed Michael money. So whatever Michael writes, Trudy takes it as fact. More trouble. In a letter from Hans (29/11/1997) Hans withholds Fl 1000.00 from Ma to Antoon, even though earlier Michael did not pass on another Fl 1000.00 to Antoon. This matter was eventually settled. Too much shit flying in this family. See, this family was screwed up long time ago. Now if we could stop throwing shit at each other, that could pave the way for more amicable family relationships. Not happening. |
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CHILDHOOD FRIENDS:
Rikie van de broek Sloeg met de vuist op de ijsco kar (bocht in de Berg en Dalseweg) Michael Goutier Zoon van de familie Goutier (hardsteen groeve in Soignies, Belgie) |
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Seek to understand, then seek to be understood. |
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CHILDREN AND THEIR ACTIVITIES
Marcel (Marcellus Antonius Maria van der Weerden)
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